23 jun 2012

you have reached the blog of ace. i'm presently away on holiday. if you will leave your name and number, i will know you are a complete wanker and avoid you at all cost.


don't cry, kiddies. i will be back soon enough. in the meantime, i have opened the archive. lots of good stuff in there. have a look around, amuse yourselfs. just remember: you break it, you buy it.

cLiCk HeRe FoR aRcHiVe....

22 jun 2012

i go to the woods because i want to live on purpose, and by that i mean to focus only on the essential facts of life and see if i can't learn what life has to teach, because when it comes my time to die, i do not want to discover that i have wasted my life. i do not want to merely exist--life itself is so valuable! i want to live deeply and get absolutely everything i can out of life. i want to endure on the barest essentials so that all pieces of my existence that are not the true essense of life will be banished. i want to lay everything bare and drive life into a corner, reduce it to its lowest terms. and if, at its base, life is dirty and unpleasant, so be it, or if it is glorious and beautiful, so be it. i will experience first-hand the whole effect of it and expose its true nature, be it unpleasantness or the beauty, for all the world to see. i do this because most folks, it seems, aren't certain whether the force behind it all is destruction or creation, and being uncomfortable with uncertainty and wishing to ensure security, they've somehat hastily concluded that our prime function on earth is to worship the force of creation.

21 jun 2012

it came to me as in a dream
cherry island serenade
sky of blue sea of green
cherry island serenade

when we were young i loved you so
i could not bear to let you go
yet it was you i could not trust
off you went
wanderlust

it came to me as in a dream
cherry island serenade
sky of blue sea of green
cherry island serenade

ten thousand yesterdays today
since you packed to go away
still in my heart i love you so
i will never
let you go

it came to me as in a dream
cherry island serenade
sky of blue sea of green
cherry island serenade

here i sit and here i ponder
your desire to go to wander
would you feel the same today
and still try
to go away

it came to me as in a dream
cherry island serenade
sky of blue sea of green
cherry island serenade

you will be forever mine
at my table you will dine
and my bed is where you sleep
my darling you do sleep
so deep

it came to me as in a dream
cherry island serenade
sky of blue sea of green
cherry island serenade

20 jun 2012

went to see this.

enjoyed it muchly.

superbulous special effects.

fanstabular costumes.

kristen stewart moved her facial muscles a bit more than one would've thought possible.

chris hemsworth is a darling.

did not understand the milk bath.

dwarfs hilarious.

envied charlize theron's wardrobe of crowns.

plot predictable.

did not realise there was a brother in the tale. (was there??)

team william? team huntsman!

stuptaculous castles and towns and black forest and bird faeries and magic mushrooms and (did i mention) castles and long stretches of shoreline and moss covered turtles and campfires and troll bridges and c.a.s.t.l.e.s.

it's good. go see it.

(also saw a preview of "brave" which is a cartoon but looks good. wanna go with?)

19 jun 2012 (bonus)

this is a special bonus post for miss tonay. the making of this post required my transferring the pic from phone to blog, which i chose to do by emailing the pic to myself, downloading it, then uploading it to the blog. this maneuver resulted in that occurrence of my emailing something to myself whilst simultaneous acquiring amnesia and subsequently becoming giddy over having received an email in my special email place, followed by the complete letdown of seeing the email and remembering it is from me. the only saving grace is that there were no witnesses to this debacle.

here's your picture miss tonay. enjoy!

19 jun 2012

yestereve i undertook a bit of toenail maintenance, which sounds a laudable endeavour but as with so many endeavours which i undertake... i was overly enthusiastic. specifically, i removed the greater part of my port-side market-going piggy. just clippity-clip-clipped him right off. he didn't seem to particularly care, as he had apparently sort of given up and let go... but not completely. so i have partial exposed nail bed and partial crescent toenail. wanted to get the entire thing but damn piggy's hanging on to the tail end for dear life. had a dr check it out and he said it looks okay but to leave it alone. i have lost toenails before but there's always been a new nail underneath. sort of jumped the gun this time. would you like to see a picture?

18 jun 2012

you think it's the last time, that you're done with it, that you will be able to move on. but just as you turn that corner towards moving on? well. there it is waiting for you right around that very corner, and you're like... you're asking yourself - again? you're wondering if it will ever truly end.

17 jun 2012

today in the united states of america, we celebrate fathers day. in keeping with this tradition, i plan to go with my father on a canoe "float" down a local river. this "float" is organised by the local watershed association, a body dedicated to preserving and restoring the ecological health of the watershed, and is clearly designed to be a fun rather than a taxing activity. i have talked with my father about it, and we plan to have fun. yes, we "plan" to have fun. that is how he rolls, see? i find his quirks endearing. i am blessed to be able to spend this time with my father, and doubly blessed that he does not bug the living hell out of me.

16 jun 2012

i was all set to watch rizzoli&isles off the tivo when my roommate goes -- come on with me now, girl, don't make me run back here and fetch you for supper. so i came on now and that's why i am sitting at starbucks, sipping a grande espresso roast (not to be confused with a grande espresso) topped off with a bit of skim milk. that's why i am sitting here writing to you 'stead of watching my show. that's why i am pondering the vagaries of suburbia, for the millionth time. wondering why i love it here so, when it's nothing but empty anonymity, and then realising, yes, i have answered my own Q, the very same.

15 jun 2012

mid june
walk to the moon
the year's halfway over
passing too soon.

on monday morning the grumbling abounds.
"wish it were friday" is making the rounds.

mid june
walk to the moon
the year's halfway over
passing too soon.

all of that wishing is working a trick -
pushing the earth round its axis too quick.

mid june
walk to the moon
the year's halfway over
passing too soon.

blink and you'll miss it! the year's nearly done.
(but it all starts again - month janus, day one.)

mid june
walk to the moon
the year's halfway over
passing too soon.

14 jun 2012

did a little shopping after work and when i had unpacked all the packages, i realised there were a couple things missing. called the store and learned they had the items and would be open another 23 mins (precisely) so i'd better hurry up and get down there, honey. arrived to find the items were in a bag all tied up nice with a note - "left at #5 6.30pm --natrese". i'm halfway thinking that's great how natrese put my stuff in a bag with a tag, then i'm halfway thinking: hell, natrese, you looked up my freaking phone number and emailed me a receipt, how tough would it have been to give me a li'l ringydingy, tell me i left a bag?

that's right - i am blaming a minimum-wage earner for not taking responsibility for my purchases cause THAT'S HOW I ROLL.

13 jun 2012

what
do you see
when you look
down at me
from your perch
in the tree
little bird?

who
do you think
brought you seed
and a drink,
kept your health
in the pink
little bird?

how
can't you check
'fore you poop
on my neck,
i mean, shizz,
what the heck
little bird?

where
is your loo,
can't you go
there to poo,
'stead of on
those bellew
little bird?

why
din't you look
'fore a dump
you partook,
and my pride
you forsook
little bird?

when
i can find
my way up
i will climb
to your perch,
o sublime
little bird.

and
when i do,
no more ques-
tions for you,
o my, yes
you are through
little bird!

12 jun 2011

here's something that bugs the hell out of me.

say you're playing soccer, and a member of your team makes a less than stellar pass. then another teammate goes -- "c'mon guys, good passes!" and i always want to be like, "well hell, i thought it was bad pass night and look at me, i wore the wrong shoes."

what is wrong with people. i mean, why would you imagine we need reminding that it's good passes we're after.

11 jun 2012

i am sad when no one is here, when no one stops by to read what i have to say, but i don't want to call attention. i don't want to invite you because if you're invited, then you don't come of your own volition. i simply wish to sit here and be me, and for you to find me here being me, and for you to love me as i am.

i don't think that's too much to ask...

like ants, humans are designed to live together in community. we work together, play together, eat together, entertain each other, encourage each other, keep each other well. unlike ants, humans have burdened our societal living with layer upon layer of complication, structure.

what do we need to live? shelter, food & water, clothing, love. what do these things have to do with closed circuit televisions, with weddings, with money? outside of the context that we place on them, i mean. does a closed circuit television provide shelter? does a wedding provide love? money can purchase food and shoes, but you can't eat money or wear it. not really, or not for long anyway.

to be responsible to each other, to live maturely in community, does not require that we submit to the crush of bureaucracy. malcolm gladwell tells us in "the tipping point" that when a group grows to over 150 (if i remember correctly) people, we cannot each know the other. up to 150 relationships is manageable. beyond that, to maintain peace and productivity, we must establish the impersonal systems that comprise bureaucracy.

why do we choose to live in groups of over 150? is bureaucracy somehow natural?

living in shared organisation is natural for humans and shared organisation is culture. but that's not what we mean when we say we want to shed culture. instead, we mean we wish to drop the systems of monetary exchange, the fashions, the technology, the entertainments and distractions, the fried food, the specialised footware. we mean the things that are extraneous to our survival and detrimental to our happiness.

going to work to earn a living by making a thing that will be sold to someone else who is going to work to earn a living by making things that i will purchase... the circularity is pointless. if we could remember how to grow our own food, build our own homes, make our own clothes, sing each other to sleep... we would have more space in our brains for happiness and in our hearts for love.

10 jun 2012

whilst i was joggity-jogging around the hood today, this family (ma, pa, and two little kettles) were out for a walk. they were going clockwise and i was hitting the counter route, so i passed them twice. the first time it was just hey-hey-niceday-okay, but the second time by, pa goes - "wow, that was fast!!"

i immediately shrunk him with my shrink ray so's i could carry him around in my hand and he could tell me - "wow, that was fast!!" - anytime i go joggity-jogging.

okay, that last part isn't true. i keep him in my pocket, not my hand.

okay, but seriously, he did say that. made me feel pretty good.

9 jun 2012

my favourite colours are periwinkle, pine, and silver. after years of using the box of 64 crayolas, i am sure of it. i always think of them in that order - periwinkle, pine, silver - so if someone asks i just say periwinkle. it's too complicated to explain that i have three favourite colours and that i love them all three the same.

8 jun 2012

through a convoluted set of circumstances i ended up meeting an acquaintance at starbucks to "visit".

o. m. g.

i have never in my life fallen victim to quite such an onslaught of verbiage. she would neither shut up nor quieten down. i was afforded time to nod and space to smile but otherwise, i was compacted into space normally reserved for a sheet of paper, by the sheer torrential force of her words.

never again.

7 jun 2012

big plans for saturday: lug all my summercamp equipment out of the basement, take inventory, and make a shopping list.

i have been looking forward to this for weeks. grandma-bec used to say that most of the fun was in the planning, and although that sounds a bit odd on the surface, it makes sense. yes, okay, i am a professional planner by trade, but scheduling and workload balancing are not exactly the fun sort of planning that she was talking about. she meant that looking-forwardness that accompanies the buildup to any solid adventure.

for weeks, i have been making lists in my head and scribbling notes about stuff to remember to bring. lifeguard certification cards. harmonicas. that beach towel with the bandanna design. extra contact lenses. my inhaler. my sleeping bag. every time i think about something to bring, that thought reminds me of where i will be and what i'll be doing.

i need the lifeguards certs because i'll be teaching canoeing. the harmonicas are for the 4th of july harmonica band. that bandanna beach towel will warm in the sun on the dock whilst i swim laps in the lach. the extra contact lenses are so i don't lose my glasses into the deeps off the side of a canoe. my inhaler is because i am lame.

i need my sleeping bag because this year, i WILL sleep fully outside! (at least once...)

6 jun 2012

today, two nurses stationed an RV in the car park at my offices with the object of providing mammograms whilst simultaneously billing the entire process to insurance (no co-pay), so i went to the RV and had them to gram my mamms and it is truly not so terrible as i had been led to believe.

i feel as if i have been through initiation, though i remain unsure as to the nature of the club.

5 jun 2012

the problem with working at home is that i feel compelled to work.

i mean, at the office, 2/3 of "working" is just being there. a steady stream of people drop by my office with questions, concerns, issues, decision points. plus - there are emails to answer and meetings to attend. there's not a lot of heads-down work.

which is why i am at home - to facilitate the heads-downness.

the pro side is increased productivity through enhanced focus. the con side is increased productivity through enhanced focus. no seriously, the con is that i feel compelled to produce a concrete deliverable. my work at the office produces soft deliverables such as guiding a meeting or directing a coworker or supplying information to another department. concrete deliverables are hard.

4 jun 2012

the guy who lives next door likes to have a vegetable garden in his backyard.

he's old. he can't dig. he can't lift. he can't plant or water or do much of anything except stand around while his allergies act up.

but, he likes to have a vegetable garden in his backyard. so, we dig and we lift and we plant and water. today we planted 10 tomatoes. 10 -- for one man.

yes, of course, we will get tomatoes, too, and there is a gentle satisfaction that comes from eating something that grew from something that you planted in the backyard next door... a gentle satisfaction which is a world away from the bright shiny satisfaction that comes from hard-fought accomplishment or contested achievement. a soft, contented feeling of having earned something not in-opposition-to but instead, in-conjunction-with.

3 jun 2012

i remembered what i wanted to talk to you about...

"swim: 10 times
read: 750 pages non-fiction
run: 1000 miles"

jeez. why did i do this? what the hell is the matter with me? i hate having goals. they freaking suck the fun out of everything.

take the swimming for example. have i been? decidedly not. and how does that make me feel about swimming? i feel no joy for swimming; rather, i completely resent its nagging self hanging over my head. however, i have rediscovered the joys of ballet. yes, THAT ballet -- the one with the toes and whatnot. in my fitness center there is a barre. i don't know why it is there, but it has always been there. so. a few plies, eleves, releves, et cetera. they're good for strengthening the feet and ankles, and they are FUN. will i set ballet goals? oh, hell no.

750 pages non-fiction. hahaha! ha ha ha ha. my reading bone seems to be broken. i keep starting and dropping books. i never do that. never! i mean, once back in the day i tried to read 'marjorie morningstar' and couldn't bear it and quit. since then i am fairly certain i have never dropped a book. or, maybe one. but it is definitely not something i do. until now. tried that hedgehog book and couldn't hack it. right now i am trying 'wildwood dancing' and also, not working. the last book i finished was in early april. Early April for crissakes. so. reading is currently not working for me and i am contemplating returning to harry potter, but that's a bit of a cop-out. of all things, reading IS something i can do. so, might as well not read some non-fiction pages if i am not reading anything, right? right. richard feynman it is. surely i can read prof feynman.

last but not least, let's not talk about the running just now, shall we not?

my goal for next year is: no goals!

2 jun 2012

i swear there was something i wanted to talk to you about and it was interesting and philosophical, but i can't remember what it was so instead we will talk about socks.

what sort of socks do you like? for me, there's not just one kind. i like thorlos for running and adidas for just wearing around. when those no-show socks started to be all the rage, i got them because i am a fashion lemming, but immediately i detected a problem. what problem, you ask? well, i will tell you. those no-show socks get walked down into my shoe quicker than you can say "asiago cheese". so? i don't wear them.

i like pretty socks. i used to have socks of every colour of the rainbow, but now most of my socks are white. okay, white with colour stripes at the top. what? i like colour. i really don't think it's a crime, but if it is, well i guess i will have to deal with the consequences. i have a couple pair black socks for wearing with my chucks. yes, black socks. you know you wish you could look good like me.

in the summertime you will see a lot of people wearing the flipflops and it's not that i don't enjoy a good floppy-flip every now and again, but in case you haven't been keeping up, the properly equipped ace comes with a heel lift. you can't wear a heel lift in flipflops any more than you can rollerskate in a buffalo herd. pluswise, i am just more of a shoe gal. flipflops slow you down, make quick maneuvers difficult, and when the transformers come, i will be escape-ready in my shoes, leaving all the flipfloppers to alien abduction (or whatever it is the transformers do).

1 jun 2012

sure as the cicadas will sing in the long summer evenings, this time of year the running community dutifully trots out the discussion of running skirts. 80% of folks are harping about how running skirts look "stupid" and the other 80% are harping about how they look "cute" and all the ballyhoo is more about people in general and women in particular being hard-wired for bickering than it is about how anyone looks in anything. however, i know you've been waiting for me to add my 2¢ so here it is: running skirts are fcking sexy as hell.

last saturday out by the galleria there was a woman wearing a little pink ruffled number jogging along and - i kid you not - stopping traffic. literally. brake lights were lit. tires were squealed. horns were honked. all on account of a jogger jiggling her ruffly pink can down the sidewalk.

sweat. motion. the implication of easy access. don't act like you don't get it. you might not want it, but don't act like you don't get it.

when i put on my running skirt it is generally to do a bit of grocery shopping and whatnot, but if the occasion is running then putting on the skirt is not about looking cute and sure as hell not about looking stupid. it's me and my skirt hitting the road for a sweet little parade. i couldn't say that i have stopped traffic, but i know how i look.

fcking sexy as hell.