31 mar 2012

i like to do my taxes on paper. i like to read the form, find the box, fill it with the correct information. i like to see all the other items on the form just to be sure whether they apply to me. bureaucratic financial serendipity, if you will. i also enjoy the mental challenge and the ability to say that i do my own taxes. it's the marathon of home finances. you've got your little financial 5Ks where you balance the checkbook and pay the monthlies. you've got your 10K decisions whether to purchase this or that big ticket item, and your little sprints to the grocery each week. but the taxes - that's the marathon, baby! and i like not only the control of doing them myself, but being able to say, i do my own taxes.

two years ago, i decided to file in a certain way that i thought would be more beneficial to me but required more forms. last year, i got a bit tangled up in the forms and ended up paying hr block nearly $400 to disentangle me. that was humiliating and expensive. this year, i am back to doing them myself the old way from before i got all fancy with it.

this year my tax comes to 13% of my taxable income. i have no credits to stand between me and this figure, so that is what i will pay - 13%.

it is a lot of money and i am not even close to persuaded that i am getting my money's worth.

30 mar 2012

one would have a cause to wonder,
might could have a wont to ponder,
things one doesn't know.

in a dark dale one might wander,
down beyond and down beyonder,
into what's below.

and there one finds that which is sought,
like worm in birdie's beak is caught -
stranded out of reach and naught
is what one has to show.

29 mar 2012

i look at the words on a page from my past
and i wonder
what became of my brain -
where went my ability
to assemble words in a way that drew out their meaning.
like bricks assembled
into a house
or
into an outhouse,
words are merely construction material
that we place on the framework of grammar
and bind with the mortar of punctuation
to build a conversation
or a monologue,
an essay
or a poem.
back in the day, i had mad skillz.
now, perhaps, i am simply mad.

28 mar 2012

today is the birthday of my bff from high school. we still see each other occasionally, on accident. we used to get together every few months for lunch, but we just sort of quit doing that... wonder why? hmm.... maybe because i don't like doing lunch? yeah, well, it's either that or the fact that we don't have a thing to say to each other. i mean, i like her okay. she's cool for an old person and all. but our relationship was built on smoking in the girls room, playing hooky, and studying our asses off -- none of which applies to real life. (what? why yes, i was valedictorian and she, salutatorian. i meant it when i told you we studied our asses off.)

27 mar 2012

this morning, my roommate and i had a medium-depth discussion about hunger games. i mean, we weren't drafting a grad thesis or anything, but we weren't just talking about the costumes, either. we talked a bit about the story itself and about the social commentary contained therein. it was a fun, semi-intellectual discussion. we do a lot of that... a lot of talking. we process thoughts, bounce ideas around, gossip, dream, plan, talk smack, talk serious, talk shit. we can talk about anything -- current events, reruns of friends, the mechanics of soccer, other peoples's lives, scrabble. sometimes i will bring something new to the table. sometimes he will. sometimes it's simultaneous, like with hunger games. yak yak yak. it is amazing that after decades of talking to each other, it is still fresh and we still have plenty left to say.

26 mar 2012

i went running today in a new place. i mean, a different place, for me. not a new place like it just sprung out of the earth or something. it was an existing place, but for me to run there was new. okay, i am sure you get this.

i had a lunch thing and it was drive-yourself day in carpool, so i was like, well i guess i can run after work. because i generally run at lunchtime there is limited time so i change clothes in the locker room and run from the office building. 9 times out of 10 i head the same direction and take the same path day after day. you'd think i'd be sick of it... best not to think about that too much. anyway, i don't drive to a run location at lunchtime because of the extra time it takes to drive somewhere. after work, there are more options.

i was thinking i would just drive home to run, but then i thought of this little park in town. i don't know why i thought of it. i have been there like one time. but it came into my head. boom. immediately, i was compelled to go there. compelled! no problem. i knew where it was.

i started heading over and took what i thought was a shortcut, but it didn't come out right so i went back to the main road and tried again but when i got close to the park i thought i knew which way to turn, but i turned the wrong way. now. you are thinking i am a dumass but what you don't know is that's a very tricky intersection.

by this time i realised there was no way i was going to get there on my own so i texted someone that's been there many times to get some directions but i committed the cardinal sin of direction-asking -- i kept moving. the directions weren't matching up and i was getting frustrated and i was like, forget it! i am just going home! but my texter-buddy said - no no no, don't do that, turn around, go back.

* sigh *

first i was like, shut up you. then i was like, shut up me. if you see what i mean there. first i was doubting the whole adventure, but then i was like, NO! no, i will not give up on this thing which i have been bizarrely compelled to do by the whims of my brain.

so i turned around and went back and this time i turned left instead of right and it was right to go left and i was there. i parked the car, got out, and went running. how was it, you ask. as a matter of fact, it was brilliant.

25 mar 2012

we went to see hunger games movie last night. i thought it was a good movie.

first - i read the books and found the movie to be fairly true to the book. not that you have to stick to the book in a movie. i found myself thinking at one point, "but that's not what really happened." and remembered that the reality i was comparing the movie to is a fictional book. so... what's correct in the world of fiction? there was a book adaptation and a movie adaptation of a story born in suzanne collins's brain. there is no "right way" with that. so, it was funny to be thinking "that's not right". but, anyway, the movie was pretty true to the book. there were a few little differences but from what i can tell the they were to condense things. can't fit the entire book into a movie.

second - i am not sure you could understand the movie if you had not read the book. the guy i saw the movie with said he got it, and okay, it's a fairly simple plotline, but there were a ton of nuances. maybe that's how it always is with a movie that's based on a book -- you can get the main point, but you miss all the little stuff.

third - the casting was in most cases superb. lenny kravitz as cinna was spot on casting, although i would have wanted to see more of his character. i had my doubts about woody harrelson as haymitch, but he was magnificent. jennifer lawrence made a very good katniss. i don't think i'd seen her in anything, but she pretty much fit the bill of how i had imagined katniss.

fourth - the directing was maybe a bit uneven. i know that katniss is mostly subdued and holds herself inside, and that the times that she comes out of her shell, she's uncomfortable, and it's not that that wasn't portrayed accurately, but... it was... oh, i don't know. just not well done, okay?

fifth - the cinematography was at times a stunning distraction. i am so NOT a fan of the handheld camera. i get that it's supposed to mimic the natural movements of one's head, but it's someone else's hand and someone else's head. it has the effect of making the camerawork noticeable, and the whole point is that the camera should not be noticeable.

sixth - this is not about the movie. the three books would have been better as one book. the second book was pretty much extraneous and the third could have been condensed to four or five chapters and tagged onto the first. the potential here is for a complete dystopian morality tale in one volume. so so so much more portable into the future. lord of the flies, brave new world, 1984, and you know, so on and so forth - all in one volume. not only more physically suited to be a classic, but more condensed and well-edited, it would have been a better book as one book.

that's all i have here. have you seen it? read it? both? neither?

24 mar 2012

i am simply not that sort of runner.

(not that you'd care.)

most of the people i know who run run seriously. like, they do workouts and shit. who does workouts? kids who run track do workouts. olympians do workouts. regular people don't do workouts. these people think they are regular people. HAHA. not so much.

i like to go out and jog around.

a few years back, i got all caught up in running marathons and tried to do two in the same year. i ended up on a medical mystery tour that ended with an asthma diagnosis. i think i had asthma all my life and when i tried to do more it showed up. after that got sorted, i got all caught up in running distance and tried to run 2000 miles in one year. i ended up with a stress fracture. i know more now about leg length differential and i'm not sorry i learned it, but i blame the quest-for-2000 for the stress fracture.

i like to go out and jog around. when i get sick or hurt, i can't go out and jog around.

my running is not a means. not a way to become faster. not an investment in winning races. my running is an end in itself. if it is a means at all, it is a means to more running. the only way to be able to run is to run. sure, i got caught up in running stuff before, but i've learned my lesson. i don't mean "running hurts you". i mean, i have learned that what i love is the running so the external goals are just a distraction and a risk. it's not worth it to me to lose running time. this doesn't mean i am saying there's anything wrong with goals, and i certainly don't believe everyone would agree with me. for a lot of people, running is a means to something else, like winning races.

it's like this. some people train so that they can run marathons. i run marathons so i have an excuse to do the training. it's the saturday 10-miler that holds the allure for me. the marathon is just the reason i give people. they think running a long way in order to train for a marathon is crazy. they'd never understand running a long way in order to run a long way.

23 mar 2012

i was going to write you a blog but i fell asleep.

22 mar 2012

i eat dirt for breakfast.
i eat dirt for tea.
i eat dirt and i drink mud.
dirt and mud, that's me.

if you eat dirt for breakfast,
and you eat dirt for tea,
if you eat dirt and you drink mud,
you still won't be like me.

21 mar 2012

you know that thing where people get really anxious and they take out their stress by cleaning? that would be useful. i am more the drive-around type. not very useful.

20 mar 2012

you'll like my pills and potions
and the way they make you feel.
this one here will cheer you up,
and this one helps you deal
with that over-cheered-up feeling,
gets you back under control.
oh, yes, my pills and potions
are a solace to the soul.

i can fix a mixture
or a salve or remedy
for whatever ailments ail you.
step right up and you will see.
all my chemicals and powders
are the purest, naturally.
i can restore your health, your strength,
your youth, vitality.

if you are feeling down,
take a spoonful of this syrup,
and my secret recipe, no doubt,
will be the thing to cheer your right up.
do you have warts, or scaly skin,
or pimples by the faceful?
this pill will cure those trivial ails
and as a bonus, make you graceful.

is your baby bald and bowlegged?
your daughter sort of ugly?
your son a soft and doughy sort?
your husband short and stubby?
i can cure most anything
with items from my wagon.
for cures like this you'd usually pay
several bucks per flagon.

but have i got a deal for you,
though only for today,
any bottle, pouch, or jar
can go home with you, to stay.
you don't have to pay a dime
for a sample of my wares,
and i will mix up just the thing
to banish all your cares.

now, when your sample's good and gone,
if you think you'd like some more,
well come right on back and see me -
i've got plenty here in store.
but i want you to know first
what wonders you'll receive.
so you just try a bit of potion.
just a bit... and you'll believe.

you'll like my pills and potions
and the way they make you feel.
this one here will cheer you up,
and this one helps you deal
with that over-cheered-up feeling,
gets you back under control.
oh, yes, my pills and potions
are a solace to the soul.

19 mar 2012

someone who knows me fairly well has taken to calling me 'katniss' and i don't mind that. in case you're not familiar with katniss, she's the lead character in the hunger games and embodies a lot of enviable characteristics. she's smart, resourceful, brave, protective, loyal. she comes off as aloof but she's not without feelings -- she's just protective, doesn't give herself away. my favorite thing about katniss is that although she knows what she is capable of and doesn't often doubt herself, she doesn't realize the effect she has on others. she has a charm, a power, a charisma that she wields naturally, unknowingly. i would like to be that unaware of myself. i mean, charisma aside, i would simply like to have a moment free from constant calibration and measurement and refinement of my participation in simple human interactions. it's like a GPS in my brain... 'recalculating'... 'recalculating'... 'recalculating'... shut up, brain. it's not like you're ever going to get it right anyway.

18 mar 2012

i love you!!! i love you all!!!!!!!!!!!!!!

17 mar 2012

when i heard today that pope shenouda had died, my first reaction was, "but the pope's name is john paul" and then my next thought was "maybe it's a rapper".

i am telling this to you in order to hold myself publicly accountable for my pathetic narcissism.

firstly, pope shenouda is not the pope of the catholic church. john paul is also not the pope of the catholic church. the pope of the catholic church is pope benedict. pope john paul was the pope of the catholic church a few years back and everyone thought he was the bomb and he died.

pope shenouda is not a rapper.

pope shenouda is the pope of the egyptian coptic christian church. that's right, folks, there's more than one pope in the world.

the founder of the christian church in egypt is purported to be mark. yes, THAT mark. mark went to egypt during the reign of emperor nero. who knew? okay, you probably knew all this. i did not.

in the same way that i would like to be able to play drums or speak portuguese, i would like to be not a complete idiot about the rest of the world. what i mean is, i would like this to happen without my putting forth any effort. i would like to be a drummer. i would like to be fluent in portuguese. i would like to be not an idiot.

and, if i were to want to invest in becoming not an idiot, where would i even begin? by the time i'd get the heads of all the world's nations and churches memorized, someone would die or be displaced. pluswise, i don't think this is a crash-course sort of thing. i think it's probably more of an immersion sort of thing.

and, at this time, my immersion is consumed with myself.

16 mar 2012

it was just another day
just another day
just another day in the life
in the life
it was just another day
just another day
just another day in the life

it was dark with the alarm
dark with the alarm
dark with the alarm chiming soft
chiming soft
it was dark with the alarm
dark with the alarm
dark with the alarm chiming soft

it was time to arise
time to arise
time to arise and ashine
and ashine
it was time to arise
time to arise
time to arise and ashine

it was cold in the room
cold in the room
cold in the room to the bone
to the bone
it was cold in the room
cold in the room
cold in the room to the bone

she did not want to go
did not want to go
did not want to go there and be
there and be
she did not want to go
did not want to go
did not want to go there and be

it was just another day
just another day
just another day in the life
in the life
it was just another day
just another day
just another day in the life

15 mar 2012

it is one of those crazy hectic days. even early, i know it is going to be tight, so i figure on running after work. just before the 10:00 meeting i realise i might have a window for running if the 10 gets over early but instead it goes long. it is raining, plus i have another meeting at 13:00 and need to prepare the agenda for that. fine. i had planned on running after work anyway.

i eat at my desk whilst preparing the aforementioned agenda, then attend the 13:00 which lasts until 14:00, then go to the 14:00 which lasts until 15:45. whew! finally done with meetings so i check my email and whatnot then think maybe i'll go run right now but it is still raining and i don't want to use a treadmill in the fitness center because i am sure someone will be watching the vandy-harvard game which i am tivo'ing. so i decide to simply go home to run there.

it is drive-yourself day in carpool, so i get in the car and drive myself. i get a few miles down the road and hear on the radio... the weather warning! thunderstorms! lightning! hail! flood! frogs! goats! clearly i am already in the car, bout as well make the best of it. when i am pretty much too far in to go back, but too far out to keep going, the conditions start to deteriorate. i think what is hitting my car just might be hail, but i am a little hail-shocked from the other day, so i am not sure, but if it is merely rain, it is still coming down hella hard so i pull into a shell station along with a bunch of other folks. we all sit in our cars under the awning for a good while. maybe 10, 15 mins.

things start to clear up so i venture back out, yet i still don't like the sound and force of that rain, so i duck under a sonic drive-in canopy. stay there another 10 or so.

things really start to clear up so i venture back out and although it isn't currently raining, there is a TON of water on the road. i mistakenly drive through a really deep puddle because my car is low slung and i live in the Land Of Giant Vehicles so nobody else is having trouble so i have no idea that i am going to be so deep in. thank goodness the car doesn't flood.

i get literally (and i mean l.i.t.e.r.a.l.l.y) 1.84365 miles down the road and the sky lets out again! i pull into the first place i see - the credit union drive through. another driver and i sit in our respective cars in our respective lanes for 15 mins.

finally, it really, really looks like it is stopping, so i venture out again, skirt another ginormous lakepuddle, and back on the road. this time, i make it all the way home.

i decide not to go running today. i know plenty of people would go, and would love it. and, i would probably love it if i got out there. the air is cool, the ground is soft. i am stressed and could do with some stress relief. but, it just seems like one more hassle. the wardrobe, the contact lenses, it's too dark to run in the neighborhood so i'd have to drive somewhere. i have had enough hassle for one day. i run for fun, so if it feels like a hassle, that sort of defeats the purpose.

14 mar 2012

so i was headed home and the weather started looking fierce. the radio report said "thunderstorm" but didn't say if it were a warning or a watch. doh! so i was skeedaddling on homewards. i knew i had to hurry because i needed to stop by the grocery. i needed to stop at the grocery because i planned to stop at the grocery. i mean, there was nothing i absolutely had to have. it's not like we would have starved without that loaf of bread and pint of strawberries. but i had planned to do it so i had to do it.

(remember when i was talking the other day about bringing my work home? seems that's happening in more ways than one. there's a ginormous project climbing steadily to completion, in the final weeks after over a year of work. it's exciting, but it does seem to be taking all my excess brain capacity and encroaching a bit into the non-excessive.)

so. i had to stop. and, i had to have strawberries.

have you ever felt compelled to do something that would be perfectly normal under normal circumstances but which when burdened with the compulsion to complete the task and exacerbated by a pressing deadline (impending storm) becomes absurd? i had to have strawberries. i could not go home without them so i had to stop at the store. i could not leave the store without them so i had to find a satisfactory pint. i scoured the display for a pint that was perfect. oh, here we go now, another layer. i couldn't accept any imperfection in a pint of strawberries that i didn't need but had to have immediatelyrightnow.

lucky for me, i found an acceptable pint, managed to get the rest of the groceries on my list without bogging down in the perfection-loop, and made it home before the storm hit.

(it rained like 4 minutes. the deck didn't even get totally wet.)

13 mar 2012

take a nap. take a bath. take a walk.
take a trip. take a drink. take a call.
make the grade. make the bed. make the deadline.
make the cut. make the change. make the next time.
break a fast. break a leg. break a heart.
break a lease. break a sweat. break apart.
stake a claim. stake a tree. stake a bonfire.
stake a bet. stake a life. stake a vampire.

12 mar 2012

for breakfast, i had a boiled egg and the sky was sunny.

at lunchtime, i had a pork chop sandwich and it rained.

in conclusion, pork chops cause it to rain.

11 mar 2012

this morning i had peanut butter crackers for breakfast then went to get groceries, stopping on the way for a starbucks. got the groceries then came home and cooked next week's lunches and messed around in the kitchen for an hour or so, cutting up cantaloupe and whatnot. had some crackers and bananas and grapes and a pork chop. watched vanderbilt win the SEC basketball championship. then, went to play some soccer where we lost. after soccer went to have beers and quesadillas with my mates, and then came home to watch golf.

10 mar 2012

i had planned an easy run for today because i've been putting in a few extra miles lately (yay!) and soccer starts outdoor tomorrow, indoor tuesday (yay!) and i'm just trying to stay smart about not doing too much (yay!). so today was to be 6 easy miles. now, when you run as slow as i do it's not always easy to run easy, so i gave myself permission to walk. i didn't want to walk, but i told myself it was okay, not to get all mad if i did walk.

i took off from the regular parking lot and immediately noticed a couple joggers around the goose pond, so i took the sidewalk, but our paths dovetailed at the end of the pond. they were going nearly my same pace and chatting annoyingly. chatnoying. i knew i could not follow these people for six miles, so i decided that when we got to the traffic signal i'd go whichever way they did not. they went straight, i turned left. as soon as i made the turn i realised this would be a fine route because i would have plenty of sidewalk, i hadn't been this way in a while so it would be interesting, and it would be long enough.

off to a good start.

i just tootled along and things were going fine. trees budding. sunshine. light breeze. interesting construction sites and older homes and one empty lot that i swear contained a house mere weeks ago. the RR tracks were 3.1 miles, so i turned around there and headed back. la-la-la. all is good.

then around 4.5 miles, my mental state began to deteriorate. who runs this slow? you might as well be walking. what a loser! you're old, fat, weak. why don't you just walk, it's not going to make any difference. who cares? no one. no one even cares what you do. why are you even out here? give up!

ouch.

i was still jogging and coming up on a woman pushing a stroller. she was walking, pushing a stroller, and it was still taking me forever to overtake her. but, as i approached and was maybe 10ft back, she looked over her shoulder and flashed me a smile, and turned back and started talking to her baby. "hey, tyka, here she comes! here she comes, tyka! here she is! say hi, tyka! say hi! hi! hi! look at the runner, tyka! look at her go! she is strong, tyka, see how strong she is? she is a strong runner. look at her run! watch her go! go! go!"

she was like my fairy godmother and she waved her word-wand and turned me into a real runner, just like that. "strong", eh? yeah, baby!

i finished up my run with a goofy smile plastered across my heart.

9 mar 2012

in THIS POST i said that my coworker said he got "wasted" cleaning out the fridger, but in fact, that is not what he said. he said, "i was hammered" which is funnier and i wish i had been able to remember that the first time. i knew i didn't have the right word, but i went ahead with the anecdote. my bad.

in other news, i am still taken with taking a bunch of my workstuffs home with me. i have TOLD YOU THIS previously. whatever was compelling me then to behave thuswise has not abated. i am still bringing home my workstuffs each day. each and every day. ad infinitum. ad nauseum. ad museum. why am i doing this? my outward mind is telling me it is so that, if i were to become ad nauseated over the weekend, i would be able to participate in the workday from the sickbed. as if. when i get sick, i watch "charmed".

ergo, my outward mind is fcking with me, covering up for my inward mind. so far, my inward mind has not come forth with the reasoning, and until it does, at which time i can deal mano-a-mano with the reasoning of my inward mind, until that time... i will simply have to lug this stuff around. that's metaphorical, right there, i don't care who you are.

(the password is 'hammered'.)

8 mar 2012

bunny rabbit
funny bunny rabbit
bunny bunny
sunny bunny
funny bunny rabbit

somebody said this to me the other day - You have a different sort of mind and that is what makes you feel bumbly and disconnected but it is also what is SO awesome about you for people who are more comfortable interacting with difference.

huh.

that's a lot isn't it.

my first reaction is that "a different sort of mind" sounds exciting and there's really no downside to awesome but then i think it sounds only lonely. but then it sounds superior and enviable. but then it sounds just sideways to the world. and then i think, who wants to be like the world anyway, and right when i am deciding i like the thought of having "a different sort of mind" i start to wonder how different my mind is, and then maybe it's not different at all, and maybe this person just thought that or worse didn't even think it but merely said it, and right when i am deciding i certainly have an ordinary run-of-the-mill mind, i get a bunny song in my brain.

do you get bunny songs in your brain?

maybe that's what it means to be different.

how would i know?

7 mar 2012

there's a big brouhaha over this:



it's a tag from a pair of men's trousers, sold by a UK company called madhouse. the controversy was fired up by a female journalist who got offended by the tag when she saw it in her boyfriend's pants. she saw the tag because she was picking up her boyfriend's pants. she was picking up her boyfriend's pants because she was tidying the house. she was tidying the house because that's woman's work.

MY work, here, is done.

6 mar 2012

been working at home today and as usual got more done in one day at home than i can manage during one week at the office. whose fault is that? clearly, i am solid. the office is to blame. so, the pro side is that a day of house working inspires in me the productivity of a team of oxen. the con side is that it crazes me a bit. i know, i know, "you're already crazy ace!" harDEE-har-har.

however.

my brand of crazy has to do mostly with wanting to be left alone, but leave me alone for a day and i am on the verge of making a telephone call to establish contact with the outside world. leave me alone for a day and i am convinced the mayans were right, so what's the point in remodeling the kitchen? leave me alone for a day and i am sending melancholy notes to my coworkers telling them what a stellar job they're doing in my absence, as if i were on elba. leave me alone for a day and i am emailing summercamp bunkmates, posting obtuse technical questions on obscure message boards in hopes of garnering a personal reply from the geeky sysop, gazing forlornly out the window like andrew henry's dog...

oh, i'll rebound by 9am tomorrow. it will only take an hour of my coworkers to have me tucked safely under the noise cancelers.

but today...


* sigh *

5 mar 2012

there was a story on NPR today about how the percentage of americans with at least a bachelor's degree is at an all-time high -- 30%. 30%?! are you for reals? that's our all-time high? seems a bit low to me, but of course, i come from a family comprising generations of folks who've obtained undergrad and graduate degrees. something that way less than half the folks living in america have managed to obtain turns out to be less than what's merely expected for this family. is this what they call privilege?

also, how can one word mean both "to be made of" and "to make up"... college graduates comprise 30% of america's population... america's population comprises 30% college grads. i am not even sure i am using it correctly, for that word has always confused me, and if it was covered in class, the attendance that day was not comprised of me.

when i googled comprise, this picture came up. it looks like those men are standing inside their instruments. that's pretty funny.

4 mar 2012

taking a break isn't easy. it's a cliché because it's true - we live in a rush-rush world where everyone's always meant to be productive. like so many things in our modern day world, what started as a laudable goal has gone awry - the puritan work ethic gone mad. i mean, c'mon. even the puritans took time off.

today has been one of those restless restful days. i've made breakfast and cleaned it up, been to the grocery, cooked next week's lunches, had some lunch myself, balanced the checkbook and paid the monthlies, finished up ford county stories. it's not like i've done nothing, but nothing i've done was forced, nothing on a deadline. i didn't run, didn't work out at all, purposefully taking a day off. i didn't start on the income tax or clean up the mess of filing. didn't wipe down the fridger. didn't install that ceiling fan... okay, the list of things that i didn't do could easily fill several pages.

but that's the point. there are always things we didn't do. you're never going to get done with everything that's waiting on you. it's just not possible, probably wasn't ever possible, even for the puritans. that's not what the work ethic is about, anyway. it's about giving your all to your work, doing your best at everything you undertake, not being a slacker. it comes down to not selling yourself short, not letting yourself down.

it's got nothing to do with that damn ceiling fan. it's about doing well the tasks you take on. it's not about fretting over the tasks you didn't get to.

in a bit, we're going for pizza and beers. we've earned 'em. after all, it's been a solid day of productive rest.

3 mar 2012

i'm not sure exactly what i have been clicking on in the yahoo news ticker, but the top stories on my ticker today are: video of an "embarrassing NHL gaffe", a photo of a mysterious light beam coming from a mayan temple, story about how an interview with a senate candidate's kid gets weird, and a bit about how the makers of an otter-based video game including a character called joustin beaver are suing justin bieber. that last one, i would have thought would have been young justin suing the otter game folk, but what do i know. those are the top four and are followed by a list of the most guessed passwords, a picture of katy perry's new look, a story about the dangers of diet soda, and finally, in slot #8, a story about the tornado damage. seven people-magazine worthy stories before the news. this is a custom yahoo home page that i log into. i use it at home and at work. i don't always click on anything and i never click on everything but the things i choose to click on are used to determine what i will be presented as options for my clickage. i mean, that's just how it works - you see more of what you've already demonstrated a liking for with your clicks. clearly, i am more interested in justin bieber's first amendment rights than i am about real news. but, in my defense, i am a complete idiot.

2 mar 2012

a bad weather front was coming. my carpool buddy said she wanted to go ahead and get home. the tornado siren went off. she said, do you want to stay? i was like, whatever. i mean, i didn't actually think it was a great idea to be in car, but on the other hand, the skies in the direction we'd be headed were much more favourable than the other direction. so, we got in the car and got on the road. she decided to take the freeway and we were nearly immediately blinded by torrential rain. i helped direct her to the outside lane so she could use the yellow line to keep her car aligned with the road. then, the hail started to fall. have you ever been in a car with the hail falling on it? louder than you might imagine. and, scary, too, because each one that hits the windshield sounds like it will break the glass. we had the radio up to listen to the ongoing weather commentary, and the weatherfolk started to name landmarks we were driving past. they named the area we were driving through! YIKES WE ARE IN THE STORM! DRIVE, WOMAN, DRIVE! i remained calm. i complimented my carpoolmate on her excellent driving skills. i surveyed the roadside for accessible ditches. i got religion.

we made it home safe. the worst of that particular pocket hit the highway we'd opted off when we took the freeway. so see? we were like 1/4 mile from the really bad stuff. completely safe. hakuna matata.

1 mar 2012

i thought i had a 10-will-get-ya-20 groupon for the bookstore, but turns out it was a 20-will-get-ya-40. pluswise, it was the half-price bookstore. yeah, baby!

now, the problem with the half-price bookstore is that they don't really have what you're looking for. they have overstocks and remainders. it's a bit hit or miss. for example, i am for some reason missing my septimus heap vol 2, but they only had vol 3. no reason, just odds & ends, that's how it goes. makes it difficult to fulfill the ol' wishlist.

and, boy do i have a wishlist of books as long as your arm! i mean, the list is long, not the books. (if you are a paraplegic, this analogy doesn't really so much apply as perhaps offend, so... look away.) do i keep the list well-organized on my iphone? bah-hah-hah-hardee-har-har. like hell. no. i do not. i keep it on a plethora of paper pieces which proliferate profligately. when i hear of a book i might like to read, i scribble on a scrap the title, author, ISBN if i can get it. it's not a wish "list" so much as a wish "hot mess".

anyhoo.

here is what i got today:

sister bernadette's barking dog: the quirky history and lost art of diagramming sentences -- by kitty burns florey
the planets -- by dava sobel
number freak -- by derrick niederman
up for renewal -- by cathy alter
the singer's crown -- by elaine issak
the crowfield curse -- by pat walsh
wildwood dancing -- by juliet marillier

the first four are non-fiction and latter three, YA fiction. YA fiction tends to be well-imagined, grounded yet out of the ordinary, innovative, easy to read, solid entertainment. the non-fiction are to help fulfill that commitment to read more non-fiction. i'll be in touch with you on how this all works out.